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Winter? Already? Not the time to start enjoying water sports!

June 5, 2015 by Fran 1 Comment

I come from an island.  The greatest island in the world, in my opinion.  And being surrounded by water I must have grown up spending plenty of time in the water.  Right?  Wrong.  Have you ever tried dipping your toes into the North Sea off Filey?  Without a full body wet suit?  And that’s protection against both the confluence (right word?) and the baltic temperatures.  It has to be said, I have spent time in the water in much warmer climes.  Such as learning to scuba dive years ago in the Whitsunday Islands.  And taking advantage of my new qualification in the balmy waters of the Red Sea in Egypt.  But for these diving experiences, this is where it stopped.
Moving to the second greatest island in the world, Australia, I could now take the opportunity to spend lots of time in the water.  Right?  Once again, negative.  Granted the water is warmer.  Ever so slightly, at least at my local beach, Balmoral on the lower North Shore in Sydney.  Granted, it was like a very warm bath in Far North Queensland over summer.
Living in the UK, not a few hours from any coastline, you would have thought I would have seamlessly segued into life by the sea.  Like a duck to, well, water.  Not so.  I have always had a natural aversion to getting wet.  This includes baths.  And showers, of any kind.  But somehow I manage to maintain these, regularly, and hence my general hygiene.  I think.  <<quickly checks around and wonders why nobody near>>
With all this in mind, this year was the year it was all going to change i posited.  Literally throwing ourselves into the deep end, it was on a boat trip to Nusa Lebongan, off the coast of Bali, that we jumped into a 2-man kayak, and without any experience, off we paddled.  What great fun it was, pretending to be in the opening credits of Hawaii-5-O.  It could almost hear the theme tune falling into sync with our oars as we circled the boat in the sedate waters of the Bali Sea. 
Bali Fun Ship
Fresh from our aquatic adventures, the next challenge was closer to home.  Even with the memory of the successful kayak trip giving so much confidence, it wasn’t without some trepidation that I decided we should try stand up paddle boarding (SUP) for the first time.  Seeing people float around Middle Harbour, looking like they are walking on water, I thought, “how hard can it be?”   Hmm, I soon found out.  I’ve never tried surfing (maybe next), but standing up on a 12 foot board, in the open sea, is easier said than done!   Staying on the board, and out of the drink, was positively going to be a challenge. 
Down to our swimmers, sporting very fetching life jackets, we negotiated our way out from the paddle board centre without too much trouble.  It was only then, after being lulled into a false sense of security, that things got interesting.  “Catching” waves (or more realistically ripples) from passing boats of various sizes really tested the balance.  Feet firmly planted forward, oar in hand, concentrating on the core of my body, I managed to make my way without much drama out into Middle Harbour.  Some twenty minutes in, in water somewhat bereft of vessels, I started to get complacent.  
Paddling away, laughing, joking with other “boarders”, I maybe didn’t see the size of the boat about to cross my path.  If I had seen it, I definitely didn’t anticipate the size of the swell it would produce.  Before you could say “man over board”, I was wobbling around on my board, looking punch drunk, with legs like jelly.  
Hawaii – 5 – 0!!
In other news, in what has been a life bereft of luck (get out the violins), I seem to have hit on to somewhat of a winning streak.  Never usually one to fill out feedback cards at the end of meals, I’d rather use crowd sourcing apps such as Foursquare, I’m rather glad I made an exception at my last visit to one of the local Greek restaurants.  Imagine my surprise, and delight upon reading the monthly newsletter and discovering I had won dinner for two for the month of June.  Although the free meal may well be the last one I choose to have there, due to very surly customer service.  I may not have been paying for our meal.  At least not the first $80 of it.  But quibbling that I couldn’t pay the balance on my bank card because it “was not worth it for you” is not going to win you my repeat custom.  The “Dancing Zorba” in Mosman will be the next Greek restaurant we frequent.
My next slice of luck came hot on the heels.  They say you have to be in it to win it.  With this in mind I bought my raffle tickets for the Cancer Research “Biggest Morning Tea”.  And wouldn’t you know, I got pulled out for a prize.  And not a bottle of old, dusty, cheap sherry.  I actually won something I would use.  Something that will come in very useful for our trip this weekend.  
They (whoever “they” are) say luck comes in threes.  What’s next?  Lotto?  <<logs onto website>>
Oh, did I mention our trip this weekend?  Winter has arrived this week in Sydney, with a vengeance.  As I write it is a demonstrably chilly 13 degrees.  The winter wardrobe is out, yet it is not enough.  I need to escape this artic hell.  OK, I haven’t gone THAT soft.  But it is cold.  
So, on Saturday, off to Thailand we go for some much needed warmth, rest, and relaxation.  Our destination is the island of Koh Samui, off the east coast of Thailand.  I’m looking forward to kicking back in the pool bar with a cocktail, or two, and very much interested to see how the island has changed in the last 15 years.
Hasta pronto chicos!

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Driving the road trip off the bucket list

March 29, 2015 by Fran 1 Comment

It has taken a long time to get around to this latest instalment of the Australian odyssey.  I could blame a lot of things.  But where would that get me?  It would just reinforce the tired, lazy stereotype of the “whingeing pom”.
So, here I am, in Max Brenner, the self proclaimed bald expert on chocolate, as I sip an Italian hot chocolate, which is so luxurious, I am half inclined to further procrastinate.
But let’s cut to the chase.  Bucket list.  What springs to mind when I say bucket list?  A film starring Jack Nicholas?  (not his best btw).  A rather morbid checklist of all the things you want to do as you count down your final days?  Or just a list of items that are more a wish list than something you are actively working towards completing?   An “aspirational list”?
For me, it’s possibly an amalgam of all these.  But without doubt, the overriding factor is a list of things that I am determined I will do.  In my lifetime.  Whilst I am still young.  Yes, I know this is patently up for debate, but it is my bucket list.  My rules.  Ergo, I AM still young.  For now.  And my bucket list is something I am actively tackling with much gusto.  Hopefully well before the bell goes on my time here and I shuffle off this mortal coil. 
And for this reason, all the items I have on said list are eminently doable.  As is being proven by my working through the list.  The most recent achievement being the camper van trip. 
What started as a germ of an idea over 20 years ago, on a walk through the salubrious surroundings of Halifax town centre, finally came to fruition, almost a lifetime later, at the other side of the world.  Where I now currently call home.  Australia. 
I suppose there are many places where you could have the quintessential road trip.  Across Route 66, following in Kerouac”s footsteps from Chicago to California.  There is also the Pacific Coast drive, on the west coast of the US.  Taking in the Big Sur, beloved of Steinbeck, up past Portland, Oregon, onto Washington state.
Port Douglas
But for me, in my adopted home country, the east coast was the place to embark on my first camper van trip.  The romantic, idealist that resides in me would have wanted to do this trip in a grandly restored VW Kombi van.  With split windscreen etc etc etc.  But, a good friend of mine would have no doubt warned me how unreliable these Teutonic beasts could be.  And would question whether I would want to be worried about breaking down at any moment, being chase by kangaroos, or mad killers of the Wolf Creek variety.  No, you are right.  
Palm Cove – the hidden secret of FNQ
We went for the rather more modern, if less stylistic, mode of campervan transport.  Which these days is a Toyota Hiace.  But, as you will have seen from my last blog, it ticked all the boxes.  And over the next 4 weeks we were lucky enough to have experienced such highlights as:
Palm Cove – one of far north Queensland’s best kept secrets.  We ARE going back
Kuranda – via the worlds longest cable car (or gondola as they are known in Oz) – 
Port Douglas – my new “would love to live here” place



Daintree – the place for crocodile spotting.  Well, only if you have “crocodile girl” with you it seems.  I did.  She was travelling with me.

Tiny Daintree village
Cape Tribulation – quite splendid isolation.  Idyllic.  And at Cape Tribulation camp site…awesome wood fired pizzas served onsite, with cold beers to wash them down.
Mission Beach – as it says on the tin, on the beach.  With a cold XXXX.  Does it get more Australian?  Fair dinkum.
Yeppoon – emergency stop having disciovered we would have had a 10 hour drive without it.  My bad.
Halifax – admittedly not really a highlight, more of a 1 pub, 1 street, town.  But on the list due to its name 
Hervey Bay – one of the best coffees of the trip.  Believe, I tried a few.  And have you ever seen SO many mobility scooters?
Bundaberg – does it need saying?  Rum…
Airlie Beach – where we spent Xmas, and had Xmas Eve sailing and snorkelling on the Great Barrier reef.
Noosa – now famous for having no camp sites with vacancies, prompting a frantic day of driving to find our home for the night. (with a bit of schmoozing, we managed to get into a site in Mudjimba).
Coolum beach – just beautiful.  And worth repeating.  Beautiful.  Oh yeah, and a damn good latte.
Having dropped the van in Brisbane, via a few toll roads (which would come back to haunt us), the trip continued by good old buses, with us having the relative luxury of real rooms at night, with a real bed.
Brisbane – New Years Eve fireworks, and very good change from Sydney, albeit on a much smaller scale
Surfers Paradise – for just being Surfers.
Byron Bay – notable for being awesome, as Byron always is, and for the magic powers of the alcohol that doesn’t manage to get you drunk.  Until you wake up in bed with a kebab, and wonder how you, and it, got there.  You know who you are.

Selling “magic” beer
And how better to end the travelling experience than to take the overnight, 13 hour, bus journey back into Sydney.  There weren’t many smiles in my travelling party of two, when the driver announced the 3.30am meal stop at a road house.  At which everybody would have to be off the bus so the driver could secure it.
Maybe chugging into Sydney, over the Harbour Bridge, on a glorious morning, at 7.30am, was not the best time to reflect on the whole journey.  But with the benefit of a good rest, a proper nights sleep, I think it was unanimously declared a success.  And something that has to be repeated.
So now, camper van trip remains on the bucket list.  Next venue?  New Zealand perhaps.

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No Fixed Abode – Road Trip part 1

January 31, 2015 by Fran Leave a Comment

If you are reading this, and know that I am without gainful, paid employment, there is no need to worry that I am finally destitute, and now living on the streets of Sydney.  No, that is not going to happen for at least a few weeks yet.
The title refers to the recent road trip, and not my current living arrangements.
Inspired by writers such as Kerouac, I have long wanted to be “On the Road”.  Set free to explore, windows down, wind in my hair, no agenda, and a very loose itinerary, I finally got to tick off another item from the bucket list.  A camper van road trip. 
“Chubby” – how I miss this little van!
However, not one that didn’t start with a little trepidation.  Neglecting to pay for additional insurance (well, I am still a Yorkshire man), thus leaving me with a $3000 excess should anything happen to the van, had me ever so tentatively reversing the camper out of the parking spot in Cairns, after checking all mirrors so often my neck was hurting.
The road trip started in Cairns, after flying up from Sydney two days earlier.  Cairns has continued to develop and improve over the years, now catering for a slightly more up market clientele, and not just for the hundreds of backpackers that have a visit to “The Woolshed” as a rite of passage on their overseas adventure. 
New waterfront developments, bars and restaurants, targeting the cruise ship arrivals no doubt, add some much needed drink and dining options if you tire of the $10 beer and burger offers proliferating central Cairns.
And as an element of this trip morphed into being a search for the east coast’s best coffee, I found a definite contender in Cairns.  If you ever find in town, and in need of a caffeine fix, head to “Caffeined”, a Mebourne-esque alley way coffee shop, with coffee that will make you want to stay in Cairns.
Hipster-ville, in the centre of Cairns
From Cairns, the plan was to head north, across the Daintree river, all the way up to Cape Tribulation, until the road runs out.  Literally.  The sealed road ends in Cape Trib, only allowing for 4×4 vehicles to travel past that point.  From Cape Trib, we were going to turn around (it is one road in, and only one road out), and then head south, back over the Daintree, back through Cairns, and continue until we hit Brisbane, a few weeks later.  It was in Brisbane that we had arranged to drop the camper van off, hopefully strike off the $3000 excess on my credit card, and then continue by bus to Surfers Paradise and Byron Bay.
The state of Queensland
Quite an adventurous undertaking, with some 3000kms of road to cover.  All of our road trip would be done in Queensland, Australia’s second largest state.  To provide a sense of perspective, Queensland is about seven times the size of Great Britain, covering an area of 1,727,000 square kilometers.
But we were in no rush, had no constraints, and set off with a great sense of adventure.

My next instalment will be to cover off the highlights, and lowlights, of the trip.  Make sure to keep reading.

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What a difference a year (or 20) makes

December 11, 2014 by Fran Leave a Comment

Yup, believe it or not, and I am not quite sure I do, I was first in Bali 20 years ago.  I agree, I don’t look old enough do I?  It was the second stop on the trip that lit the travel fire in my belly.  The trip that changed my life for the better.  The trip that made me realise what life was about, and what I needed to do to enjoy it.
A chance conversation, one lunch, with a work colleague (who has become a life long friend), quickly escalated into us jointly leaving our jobs and embarking on a 12-month working holiday to Australia.  1994.  That is where it all started.
Prior to this, the longest I had ever left the UK was for 7 days.  For various holidays to the usual spots, across Europe.
So, describing us as wet behind the ears would be something of an understatement.  This could probably explain why, within 2 hours of being in Bali, I had been robbed of all my money.  That sounds dramatic doesn’t it?  Every self-respecting travellers’ rite of passage.  Being robbed.
Maybe I should add a few clarifications.  When I say “robbed”, I mean quite purposefully distracted by some of the smallest kids you had ever seen, whilst their erstwhile friends unzipped my bum bag (YES, I did say we were wet behind the ears), and cleaned me out of rupiahs, the local currency.  And by cleaned out, I mean the sum total of the few quid that I had allowed myself as my budget for the night.  Anybody reading this, who knows me well enough, will know that spending money is not one of my strengths.  I think it is the Yorkshire genes.  So I may have lost about £5.76 in real money. Still…I was robbed.
Bali, 20 years ago.  Apart from the trauma of the robbery, the things that stick in my mind from that very first trip in June 1994, was arriving at a very small, ramshackle airport.  Very different to the gargantuan, gleaming terminal, just opened this year.  Staying in Kuta, boy how that has changed, we found THE place to drink, a happening little place called Sari Club on Legian Street.  Many of you will know the Sari Club as the place that terrorists struck on October 12th 2002, decimating the club, and the surrounding area, taking the lives of 202 people. 
Bali bomb memorial
 Kuta looks to have recovered in many ways from this atrocity, and the development now seems rampant, to the extent that, like many places I’ve seen through southern Thailand, the tipping point has been breached, between tourism, and over development.  There are no moments of peace available at the memorial for the bomb attacks, on the site of what was Paddy’s bar, another of the bomb sites, as open air night clubs blast out tunes from the turntables, drowning out even the traffic. Some feat in itself.
The place is now unrecognisable, yet, there is one thing that will never change.  And that is the wonder of the setting sun, which we viewed from a little plastic stool, on the beach, with an ice cold Bintang.  THAT is what brought travellers to Bali all those years ago.
One other thing that doesn’t change, and gets much worse, is the traffic situation.  Why the roads have lines, and traffic lights, is beyond me.  It literally is everyman, and woman, for themselves. Scooters and motorbikes weave in and out of traffic, taking their life into their own hands.  And as you can see, not just their lives, but those of almost every member of the family too.  As a seasoned scooter rider, on the mean streets of Sydney, I had a change of heart from my original plan to hire my own wheels and rip up Bali.


Just 6 hours from Sydney, Bali is a different world.  And it wasn’t just a result of the wines, and whisky, and gin that was consumed on the flight.   Much alcohol was required after the stress of making it through some of the longest queues I had ever seen at Sydney airport.  And then equally long queues on arrival at Denpasar airport in Bali.  That said, the long queues gave plenty time to read and absorb the warning signs regarding ebola, and how you could catch it, such as “touching a dead body”, something that I then made a studious effort to avoid whilst I was there.
The week was spent in a great hotel in Tanjung Benoa, slightly north of Nusa Dua, in the south of Bali.  A far cry from my humble abode whilst in Kuta on my second visit in 1999, where I stayed in a very quaint little bungalow.  With a fresh flask of tea and banana pancakes served up first thing every morning.
Seven days flew by in a whizz of all you can eat breakfasts (it turns out I can actually eat quite a lot.  Who knew?), mid day beers at the swim up bar in the pool, trekking with elephants and hugging orang utangs, and lots of pork, a staple of every Balinese dinnertime.  There were satays aplenty, and large Bintangs all around.  One of the days was spent on the Bali Fun Ship, its actual name, where much fun was had on a day trip to a little island off the east coast of Bali, Nusa Lembongan.
I can’t go without mentioning the fact that I fell victim to the infamous Bali belly.  Probably as a result of the curry I had, that did in fact taste very good whilst eating it.  What I didn’t anticipate was the poo-snami that it would bring on the day, and subsequent days after. 

Oh, god, no.

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Bringing in Spring

October 19, 2014 by Fran Leave a Comment

For those of you that missed me and wondered if I was still alive, I am.  For those of you that never even noticed there had been a slight hiatus between blog posts, I’m upset and a little bit offended 🙂
Life has been rolling along nicely since we last spoke.  A cheeky weekend in Singapore lifted the spirits at the end of August where I took souvenir shopping to new heights and brought home something to spruce up the apartment.  And who can resist a visit to the beautiful Raffles hotel, to the Long Bar for a famous (at least amongst tourists) Singapore Sling cocktail!
View from dinner in Singapore
September brought in Spring, and how I was needing it.  Maybe my blood is thinning with living in Australia, or perhaps I’m just becoming soft, but this year I even had to resort to buying a heater for home.  I was in grave danger of dying from hypothermia so the extra dollars added to my electricity bill was a small price to pay to live to see another summer. 
As the heater got put away, out came the thongs.  Yes English readers, I mean flip flops.  Or jandals if anybody from across the Tasman is reading. 
And the first thing you do when bringing out your feet from hibernation?  Why, you have a pedicure of course!  Don’t you?  To protect my very macho image, I must add a disclaimer to this, saying that it wasn’t actually my idea.  I think it was suggested more in jest, but in the spirit of trying everything once, there I was, one Saturday afternoon, sat in my chair getting pampered. And I must confess, it was a very pleasant experience.  At least once I had convinced them that no, actually my toe nails do NOT need painting.  I am now wondering whether I need a manicure, for my over worked hands.  Thoughts anybody?
The start of October allowed my to show off my newly pedicured toes, as we bade farewell to a couple of friends who are leaving Australia for a while to travel the world (lucky buggers).  We descended into Longueville, for my second shot at barefoot bowling.  For the uninitiated, this is crown green bowls.  MInus your shoes.  Plus lots of alcohol.  
When the idea is first pitched to you it is not something you immediately think you would enjoy.  However, I think everybody was pleasantly surprised by how much fun it was (which could have been the amount of beer they drank).  What is interesting to see is how competitive people get.  We ended up having inter-european challenges, where we smashed the Germans :-), and poms v the rest of world, where results were a little more mixed.  
I had thought I may have found my sport for when I retire.  However, if you had seen me trying to roll out of bed the following morning, and subsequently rolling on to the floor, you may disagree.  I think I need to find a less strenuous sport for these ageing bones. 
Just look at that technique
All in, a fantastic day, that somehow finished in the Crows Nest Hotel.  Those of you that know, or who have frequented the Crows Nest Hotel, will have an idea of how the night went.  But as they saying goes, “what happens in the Crowle, stays in the Crowie”. 
What else has been happening since my last post?  We have had a long bank holiday weekend.  But whereas in the UK everybody runs to spend the day in the pub, here they run to spend the day by the water.  Me?  I like to combine the two, and with a night staying over in the city, a leisurely Monday was spent walking around Sydney, with stops by the water for cold refreshments (for this, read beer).  
Over the same weekend, the South Sydney Rabbitohs broke a 40+ year drought by winning the rugby league grand final.  Powered on by our very own Burgess brothers from Yorkshire.  I’m sure the South’s co-owner, Russell Crowe is a very happy man.  
Also, the real sport has started again, football, and finally Utd now have some points on the board and the jokes on social media seemed to have died down, or at least are now being redirected to the hapless Brendan Rodgers.  Talking of hapless, a visit was paid to watch Sydney FC this weekend.  Or in reality, to see David Villa make his A-League debut on his 10 game stint down under before heading to play for New York City.  And he made an immediate impact.  Scoring with a touch of class not seen since Alesandro del Piero sadly left these shores. 
Since we last spoke I have also obtained my full riders licence, which means, rather scarily, I could now go and purchase a large, fast, and powerful motorbike and be let loose on the streets.  Thankfully, I am still in love with my scooter, and that will remain my mode of transport for the time being.  But now having a full licence, I am able to give “backers”.  Funnily enough, nobody seems very keen to jump on the back!  Once I buy that second helmet, there will be no excuses J
That about wraps up the last month and bit of my life.  Summer, and the holiday season is just around the corner, so keep reading to find out what the Yorkshire Expat gets up to next. 
Until the next time

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And so, into year 3…

August 4, 2014 by Fran 3 Comments

Yeah, I had to read that twice as well.  I am actually in year 3 already of my move from sunny Yorkshire, down under to the sun kissed shores of Australia.  To Sydney, to be more specific.
If you have been reading the travails of the Yorkshire Expat from the very beginning, from the embryonic outset of And we are off (a blog from exactly 2 years ago today), you will see that it has been quite a journey so far.

One of the very first pics, August 2012
And this is perhaps not a blog that you, let alone me, maybe envisaged me writing maybe 12 months ago.  The move from familiar surroundings, ones that have cossetted you for the first 40 years of your life, to a land down under, some 11,000kms away, is not one without its ups and downs.
Give it at least 12 months people said.  More seasoned observers advised making that 18 months.  Here I am, 24 months in, and I have to say that they are right.  Not until you have lived through certain milestones, celebrated at least 2 of an annual event, do you really get a sense of “being”.
Having a secure(ish), enjoyable job helps.  I work, and have worked, with some great people, and have made some good friends.  I am settled in my apartment and have been here almost 2 years, in a great suburb, with everything I could ask for.  An amazing beach on my doorstep, great cafes and restaurants, and a choice of commute into the city by bus or ferry.
One of the many friends I have made
I have now gone through 2 winters here, and know how much I appreciate summer.  Readers in the northern hemisphere may scoff when I say this, but in a country where properties don’t have heating, including my apartment, this place feels bloody cold some days, and most nights through winter.
It is now spring and how I yearn for the long summer days of November and December.  Days when I can reacquaint myself with sunscreen, flip flops, and my, currently cast aside like an old lover, BBQ.  Where I can sit on my balcony, with a cold sauvignon blanc, watching the planes fly overhead, piercing the azure sky, on their way to destinations near and far.
The esky needs dusting down and I again start my, now annual, hope that this year is third time lucky.  In that I get sun on my birthday, Christmas Day.  The gods have been against me the last two occasions and I am determined to be quaffing champagne on the beach, with the seas lapping against my feet, come December 25th.
If life is about chapters, I have read of few over the last couple of years.  Chapters about change, and transition.  Chapters about dealing with grief, from a distance, across the lonely seas, as the circle of life marches inexorably on.  People have been taken from me.  And new people have come into the world to replace them.
Xmas 2013, not on the beach

As an expat, it is as though you watch these scenes unfold from behind a pane of glass.  You can see, and hear all that happens, but the main characters are heart breakingly out of reach. 
As I turn yet another page, a new chapter is about to start.  Year 3 brings new beginnings, in economic parlance, “green shoots of recovery”.  An exciting chapter, that in a sense feels like the start of a new book.  A book I don’t know the end of yet.  I don’t even know the next chapter, but I know how the plot goes.  I’m writing that part myself.
A friend once asked me, over a year ago, what the chances were of me remaining in Australia for a full 2 years.  I think I replied “17%”, without skipping a heartbeat.  Obviously a totally arbitrary figure, but one that gave a sense where my head was.  If that same friend was to ask me know, I would need a moments reflection.  However, after that short contemplation, I would say that the chances are considerably greater.
We don’t know where life will take us.  And although we are in charge of our own destinies, life happens whilst you are making plans.  A John Lennon quote that I know I’ve used before.  But it is so true. 
A lot of life’s journey relies on timing.  And sometimes that timing is just not right.  But then, every once in a while, the stars align and the world intervenes.  And this is when you know you have to grab your moment.
So all we can do for now, is keep making those plans, and hope life is kind to us.  And with that in mind, I see no reason why I won’t be writing a similar blog in 2 years time, as a citizen of this great country.  Four years being the qualifying criteria for an Australian passport, something I thought would be out of reach this time last year.
But right now, I may only have a 17% chance of still being here in 2 years.  It could be a 77% chance. 

All I can do is take it one chapter at a time.

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